Kissing Jessica Stein:
Charles Herman-Wurmfeld did an
exceptional job of exposing the true essence of what desire truly is. We want
we do not have, rather can not obtain, therefore we search for what we believe
we want only to find out that it is not what we truly desired from the
beginning.
Within the
film we see a young woman, Jessica, searching for “Mr. Right” and in her
pursuit she actually comes across what appears to be “Ms. Right” as Ms. Right
was searching for some form of fulfillment of her own. Curiosity, being fueled
by desire, led to what we call a “bi-curious” relationship. Neither of the
women were truly interested in the idea of lesbianism however, they were
interested in finding a satisfaction through each other that could never truly
be obtained. The relationship cycle took its course and to no surprise, the
relationship came to an end. “Ms. Right” found no satisfaction from plain ole
Jessica; she needed excitement and sexual fulfillment while Jessica was
searching for emotional companionship. The desirers were caught in the trap of
trying to satisfy one’s desire with a lack. Desire is nothing more than the
longing for what one does not have.
Attempting
to fulfill desire through the curiosity of sharing a common interest with an
individual, later to find out that they are not who you thought of them to be,
is a very dangerous endeavor if one is ultimately concerned about protecting
their sense of “self.” But what is self?
Kristeva’s “Tales of Love”:
This was a
tough read for me being that it was written from a psychoanalyst. I did however
manage to make connections to Zizek, as well as having a few eureka moments of
my own.
“…actually,
the feeling, during love, of having had to expend if not give up desires and
aspirations, isn’t this in fact the price we must pay for the violence of our
passions about other?” This statement completely coincides with Zizek’s point
about the foolishness in the pursuit of happiness do to the contradicting
suffering that must take place to get there. Kristeva’s claim that “love never
dwells in us without burning us” also supports Zizek and reveals the suffering
nature of desire. As we discussed last class, Love is fueled by Desire, as it
is Desire that needs Love in order to be pursued. It is a confusing concept to
grasp, yes. The solution I can give to truly understand such topic is
experience.
Love and Desire Thought:
With the
end of the semester approaching, I can truly say that I am more than pleased
with the decision I made to apply to take this course. I’ve always longed to
discuss deep material such as Love and Desire. Never truly accepting knowing what
Love and Desire was truly about, I absorbed every ounce of information
concerning this class that could help me understand the matters as well as
finding answers to questions based off experiences that I have had and having
in my life. Aside from the idea of Desire, as well as Solaris, yes I believe
that Solaris can be viewed as a crucial theme within the course, the concept of
“self” that we discussed has been my field of interest. Up until the revealing
of the concept, I never truly took the time to try and look at my life from the
outside in. What do I look like through the eyes of others? This question stays
on my mind constantly. It’s not more so me attempting to figure out who I am,
rather figuring out who people see me to be.
And I’m
sure I’m not the only one who shares this notion but I am proud to say that I
am not and will not be for a very long time ready for a committed relationship.
With all I have going on in my life, how could I be prepared to lose myself in
another, to suffer for the happiness of my liver, to pursue desires that I’m
not really sure I have? Dealing with those things at a later date is perfectly
fine with me. When the time comes, I will be ready. As for now, I will continue
to grow, change, and figure out this idea of self until I myself am realized
through the fulfillment of another.
