Final Blog

Kissing Jessica Stein:

Charles Herman-Wurmfeld did an exceptional job of exposing the true essence of what desire truly is. We want we do not have, rather can not obtain, therefore we search for what we believe we want only to find out that it is not what we truly desired from the beginning.

            Within the film we see a young woman, Jessica, searching for “Mr. Right” and in her pursuit she actually comes across what appears to be “Ms. Right” as Ms. Right was searching for some form of fulfillment of her own. Curiosity, being fueled by desire, led to what we call a “bi-curious” relationship. Neither of the women were truly interested in the idea of lesbianism however, they were interested in finding a satisfaction through each other that could never truly be obtained. The relationship cycle took its course and to no surprise, the relationship came to an end. “Ms. Right” found no satisfaction from plain ole Jessica; she needed excitement and sexual fulfillment while Jessica was searching for emotional companionship. The desirers were caught in the trap of trying to satisfy one’s desire with a lack. Desire is nothing more than the longing for what one does not have.

            Attempting to fulfill desire through the curiosity of sharing a common interest with an individual, later to find out that they are not who you thought of them to be, is a very dangerous endeavor if one is ultimately concerned about protecting their sense of “self.” But what is self?

Kristeva’s “Tales of Love”:

            This was a tough read for me being that it was written from a psychoanalyst. I did however manage to make connections to Zizek, as well as having a few eureka moments of my own.

            “…actually, the feeling, during love, of having had to expend if not give up desires and aspirations, isn’t this in fact the price we must pay for the violence of our passions about other?” This statement completely coincides with Zizek’s point about the foolishness in the pursuit of happiness do to the contradicting suffering that must take place to get there. Kristeva’s claim that “love never dwells in us without burning us” also supports Zizek and reveals the suffering nature of desire. As we discussed last class, Love is fueled by Desire, as it is Desire that needs Love in order to be pursued. It is a confusing concept to grasp, yes. The solution I can give to truly understand such topic is experience.

Love and Desire Thought:

            With the end of the semester approaching, I can truly say that I am more than pleased with the decision I made to apply to take this course. I’ve always longed to discuss deep material such as Love and Desire. Never truly accepting knowing what Love and Desire was truly about, I absorbed every ounce of information concerning this class that could help me understand the matters as well as finding answers to questions based off experiences that I have had and having in my life. Aside from the idea of Desire, as well as Solaris, yes I believe that Solaris can be viewed as a crucial theme within the course, the concept of “self” that we discussed has been my field of interest. Up until the revealing of the concept, I never truly took the time to try and look at my life from the outside in. What do I look like through the eyes of others? This question stays on my mind constantly. It’s not more so me attempting to figure out who I am, rather figuring out who people see me to be.

            And I’m sure I’m not the only one who shares this notion but I am proud to say that I am not and will not be for a very long time ready for a committed relationship. With all I have going on in my life, how could I be prepared to lose myself in another, to suffer for the happiness of my liver, to pursue desires that I’m not really sure I have? Dealing with those things at a later date is perfectly fine with me. When the time comes, I will be ready. As for now, I will continue to grow, change, and figure out this idea of self until I myself am realized through the fulfillment of another.